It's funny because I started a blog last night about how ridiculously happy and high on life I was (what's new) and here I am, so thankful to have left work and my monstrous two year olds and their non-listening ears 2 hours early, but I have still been reminded of how good life is and how I need to continue to appreciate 'the little things.' Yes, here I am, blogging about life's greatness and all the little things that remind me so. Again, what's new? After the longest and most frustrating day I think I've had yet, at Goddard, a day full of 10 two year olds pulling each other's hair and clothes, pushing and hitting and even kicking each other, and almost always hearing "NO!" after I've asked them to do something, I was reminded by my co-teacher who brought me Starbucks after her break, that I am not in this alone. After accidentally being somewhat rude to a fellow co-worker on my lunch break, out of frustration with my day, I felt awful and childish, like my two year olds, lashing out and yelling because someone took their baby doll. I was quick to apologize and explain that I was having a tough day but that was no excuse. As I got back into my room after my lunch break and started to clean, I thought to myself, "I am going to embrace this silence," because it took my crabby kids longer to fall asleep today, some an hour later than when they usually do. As the thought crossed my mind, one of my girls woke up screaming because dad forgot to bring her binkie to school today and she was having trouble sleeping without it. I took a deep breath and went to pat her back back to sleep as I looked up and honestly, asked my homeboy upstairs if he could please make her go back to sleep before she woke up the rest of my overly-crabby kids. As little miss no-binkie fell back asleep, another woke up. And another. The cleaning had to get done so I continued to clean in hopes that my babes awake would stay quietly on their beds. 10 minutes later, the co-worker I was rude to, came in and asked me what I had for her to do. Thinking, shoot, principles office, I'm getting a talking to.. which means my directors office, she said, "You get to go home." As I happily packed up my things and pretty much ran out of the center, yelling to my director on my way out, that tomorrow's a new day and that I'm going to bring a good, positive attitude to work, that's when I crossed path's with my thoughtful co-teacher who placed a Starbucks in my hand. As I stopped in my tracks and dramatically slouched my head and shoulders with appreciation, I thought I might cry. It has been ages since I've had such a frustrating day that I felt like tears would do me good. They haven't come yet, although I thought on the way home that a solid cry would have been amazing. I told my center owner today that tonight, I was going to do all the things that make me happy; drink wine, clean, do laundry, listen to techno and watch a little HGTV. Phew, I feel better even having just written all this down. Blogging should have been on that list. 

As I pulled into my driveway and grabbed my work things out of my car, I was approached by my neighbor; a sweet, old lady who lives across the street. For the last few months, she has lived in one side of a duplex, which she owns, and in the other side lives the shittiest person you've ever met in your life. Now, I have a problem with rude people, we know this. I know that we are all human, and sometimes people have bad days (me earlier) but this man sucks. He has 3 young kids, who he swears and yells at and constantly lets run wild, and he hasn't paid this sweet, old lady rent in months. As she's asking me when Joel gets back, to help her move his things out, which was court ordered and a mess, she started to cry. I swear, at that moment, I wanted to hug her and cry with her. On top of my day, I saw how hurt she is and has been, dealing with this man who promised her that he would shovel in the winter and mow the lawn in the summer and hasn't done so since he's moved in. I am looking forward to the time when he's out of there and she doesn't have to deal with the stress and I no longer have to sit in my kitchen on a Saturday and listen to this man yell at his kids and be a terrible parent. Joel and I have said to each other many times, how sorry we feel for these kids because they know nothing different. They are being raised by someone terrible, who is doing this parent thing wrong, in my opinion, so hopefully someday they are level headed enough to realize what it is to be a good person. 

As I'm feeling better by the minute, having gotten all this out and finished my first load of laundry since I've been home, let me tell you what I intended to blog about last night. It's so funny, reading books and articles on making positive changes in your life, and taking measures to actually do so. I am proud of myself for living in the moment more. The last couple days, as I've gotten on my laptop to accomplish things for work, and I've put the work aside and taken the time to catch up with people that I haven't talked to in awhile because the work can always come later. I'm getting better about taking the time to love Joel a little better and give him that 'physical touch' love language that he needs to keep his 'love tank full.' I will always go back to reference that book. Even when I'm motivated to get things done and Oscar or Olive comes to lay on my lap and rub their furry cheeks on me with their love, I take the time to pet them and cuddle them for a minute, because that's important to them. Okay, I sound like a crazy cat lady. Happily. Doing these little things is so much easier said than done, 'living in the moment' in general, is easier said than done. But the feeling you get when you can actually see yourself making those changes, is rewarding.

Last night after catching up with my mom via Skype, I love you, technology, she informed me that her and my dad would be buying mine and Joel's plane tickets home for Christmas this year. After spending about 2 hours at Hobby Lobby in the Christmas section the other night, and smelling all of the Fall and Holiday scented candles at Wal-Mart yesterday, I could not be more ready for the end of the year. As I get older, I find myself loving the start of Fall and that part of the year more and more. Years ago, I would have never been caught saying that I was ready for Fall in the middle of August. Here I am, smelling my rustic retreat candle and looking so forward to buying pumpkins with Joel this year, because he'll be home this year, unlike last. I've always known how amazing my friends and family are, but having lived 17 hours away from all of my people for the last almost year, I've grown a stronger love and appreciation for them. I've also grown an appreciation for where I grew up. Since I've lived in Colorado, I haven't done a handful of my favorite things, simply because they aren't available here. Back home, in the Midwest, I had the Mall of America about 40 minutes away, I had the Minnesota State Fair about 35 minutes away, I had the Renaissance Festival about an hour away. I grew up on the St. Croix River and spent my summers there. Given I have mountains here, which are pretty amazing, I won't be experiencing the Renaissance Festival this year because it's about 4 hours away, along with eating my favorite, deep fried pickles at the State Fair because that's about 2 hours away. I may be being a bit of a baby here, but I look forward to the day that I can raise my family back in the Midwest so they can experience all the great things that I grew up with. Joel and I moved out to Colorado with the mentality of possibly staying forever. Well, we've decided that our love for the mountains will be met again when we have kids that aren't itty bitty, but who won't hate us for moving them 17 hours away from their friends either. Being home a few weekends back over Durand, it was confirmed that I need to have my babies grow up where I grew up, simply because having the support system of your family and friends doesn't compare to how gorgeous the mountains are. 

Let the Sun Shine.

This is far too good to not share and it's far too large to set as my Facebook status. Or so I think.

Enjoy!  

 

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered; Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives; Be kind anyway. If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies; Succeed anyway. If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you; Be honest and sincere anyway. What you spend years creating others could destroy overnight; Create anyway. If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous; Be happy anyway. The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway. Give the best you have, and it may never be enough; Give your best anyway.