I only like being spontaneous if it's planned.

Good morning! It's still morning isn't it? 

Happy day, all! It's been awhile! 

The sun is shining, the wind is gusting hard and it looks a whole lot warmer than it actually is outside. I woke up to snow covered grass this morning and for some reason didn't feel annoyance with it, as I've done in years past. I feel thankful for our very mild first Winter back in the Midwest. I was a little leary of spending Winter here and not in sunny Colorado for the first time in almost three years but it's been incredibly enjoyable. Every snow fall, I feel myself being excited instead of glum. 

What comes hand in hand this Spring, along with more sunshine and longer days, is my trip to Ireland. 22 days and I'll be flying from Minneapolis to Chicago, another overnight flight and I'll be waking up in Dublin. My Fiance' and I hoped to adventure there at this time last year but then ended up just moving our life back home to the Midwest so we pushed the trip to the back burner, but only for a little while. What better place to spend my Golden Birthday, than Dublin, Ireland? Or perhaps a quaint town outside of Dublin to better fit my personality these days. I am morphing more and more into an introvert with every passing day. Perhaps the pubs of Dublin will nudge me right back into the social, out spoken being I was once. Not that I'm no longer outspoken. I latched onto the idea of spending my Golden Birthday in Europe and I refused to let go of it. It's only your Golden Birthday once! And I'm grabbing that shit by the horns. 

Joel, my Fiance' is in Ireland now, exploring venues, making contacts, scheduling shows and bettering his music business. He is having the best time meeting people and sending me pictures to make me even more excited to meet him there and spend the last week of his tour with him. He turned 29 two days ago and got to spend his Birthday there as well. Although, I wasn't with him on his day, he spent it doing something that he loves and that's what's most important. I always find myself feeling so grateful that we both think travel is something that's important in our lives. We've both been so fortunate to travel like we have and experience different places around the world together. We were in Spain, sitting in the hot tub at our resort when we first talked about moving in with each other. That year, we moved our lives to Colorado and lived together for the first time and it was everything I thought it would be, and more. More untidiness, more guitar, more dishes, but also more love and laughter. Colorado is where he started doing his music business full time and no longer balanced his music with his landscaping business. As we moved our lives back to the Midwest last June, he's started working more for a buddies business, and is having to balance both jobs again. Bettering himself as a musician and getting as many people to hear his music and connect with them, collaborating with other musicians, well, these are all things that are important to him. Traveling to other amazing places in the world is something that he wants to do as long as he can, as long as he's able and that is great for his music business too. Friends, everywhere! And fans of Joel Kachel and his music. I will always support him in that.

Galway, Ireland

Thoughtful Snaps.

Joel found my initials in Galway.

Our time in Ireland will be less music business and more adventure and hand holding. Also,  ridiculous amounts of pictures and snaps that will blow up all your feeds while I'm there. 

Perhaps, I'll feel extremely inspired to blog while I'm there. The sun did it to me this morning, so anticipating crazy amounts of rain during my time there, perhaps maybe not. You bet your booty that I immediately started googling and reading everything possible about Ireland once my ticket was bought. Give me all the facts, I must know the facts! I've accepted the fact that it will most likely rain the whole time, so that if there's a sunny day, I'll feel extremely happy. I've accepted that things may not always go according to plan and that I need to keep an open mind and be spontaneous. Joel is the most spontaneous, randomness-loving-person and I've always said, I only enjoy being spontaneous if it's planned. I have a hard time accepting unpleasant surprises and curve balls in my day or life. Good thing, my ever understanding Fiance' will be at my side to remind me that we don't always need to follow a schedule and to lighten the heck up a little bit. Maybe Ireland will give me cool things to write about other than just my current thoughts. What makes my thoughts cool enough to publish, anyways? 

To Midwest Summers and Marriage Equality.

I read an article awhile ago, something along the lines of "Things You Must Refrain From Doing Once You Pass the Age of Twenty Six." I think it was shortly before my twenty sixth Birthday, or soon after, so I was intrigued. One of the things, was 'posting albums to Facebook.' Another thing was 'shopping at Forever 21.' Well, considering photos make me happy and I love taking them, have always taken too many, and the fact that I'm a teacher and don't make bank, I'll continue to do both those things forever, at least for a little while. Perhaps, just to rebel, I'll continue to do other things on the list too. No one likes to be told what to do.

So, after posting an album of pictures to Facebook just now, I can tell you about how wonderful it's been, living back in the Midwest and diving head first into Summer. We've been constantly surrounded by our best friends, family and familiar people. One of the first Friday nights back home, Joel didn't have a show scheduled, which is an extreme rarity, so we decided to have a small gathering around our fire. After laughing way too hard over hilarious face coasters, (look here to have a giggle) feeding our salt water fish and being huge nerds over our predator tank, beer drinking, brat eating and of course, the best company, everyone left and Joel and I laid on our hammock, talking about how phenomenal it feels to be back, listened to the trees and then fell asleep until we woke up shortly before 4AM and moved inside.

This weekend, the one that's happening as I type, has been probably my favorite so far. Friday morning, I woke up feeling irritable and wanted chocolate for breakfast. I got to work and the toddlers were all cries and mostly whines and well, they were on my level. I was with them! On my lunch break, I watched the "Breaking News" snap story on marriage equality and cried a little bit. Then I laughed to myself and thought, "You know you're getting your period when the marriage equality snap story makes you cry." I felt so extremely happy and thankful to live in a place where being able to marry the person you love, is finally legal, in all 50 states.  And then I thought to myself, "Is this really happening now? Why hasn't this already happened? How was this an issue for so long?" I love that I'm able to remember this day in history and am able to live it, be apart of it.

Friday night, I made my way to Minneapolis to spend the night with one of my very best friends. I hadn't yet seen her place, since she moved while I was still living in Colorado. Her place is perfect and in a perfect location. She treated me to, like 7 or 8 courses of delicious, to die for food that they serve where she works, restaurant Alma. We sat at the bar and started with champagne, progressed to each course, each paired with a different glass of wine and then had 2 or 3 desserts? Gosh, it felt like my freaking Birthday. After each bite, my world was rocked and I couldn't stop laughing at the fact that I must not get out much. I felt so happy. The first glass of wine we drank was straight from Malaga, Spain, the place Joel and I stayed together back in 2012. This fun fact really got me going.

Not even half.

Even after a belly so full of delicious food and a serious wine buzz, I couldn't say no to cappuccinos that looked straight out of a movie. Of course, I took pictures of everything. 

After spending a little more than 4 hours, content at the bar, chatting with the fun people she works with, we decided it was smarter to go back to her place, drink a ton of water to balance out the great amount of wine we drank and watch a funny movie like we used to do when we were younger.

We slept in until noon and then I was treated to mimosas and brunch. 

 We have been so busy, constantly going, going, going, that I haven't had much time to think about Colorado. The one thing that I do think about daily is that I would much rather bask in the Colorado heat, where there's no humidity, like there is here in the Midwest. I get snapchats of my best friend in Colorado and her little boy and for that, I am thankful. I don't even have to ask for them. Every day I drink out of the coffee mug that my co-teacher bought me before I left and I know, more often than not, I would go straight for that mug, even if all my other mugs were unpacked and stored in the cupboard with it. 

My first couple weeks back to work at KinderCare have been great. I love the Summers there. The smell of sunscreen just constantly wafts through the halls. I'm enjoying getting to know all the kids and new co-workers I spend my days with and am loving bonding again with all the old ones I've missed. I can't get over how big all the kids are, considering how little they were when I left them 3 years ago. I've gotten so many hugs from parents that tell me that seeing my face around the school again is something they love and look forward to. "You were one of the hardest to watch go and I'm so happy you're back. You are one of the best teachers." Spending my days with little siblings to some of the kids I had before I moved, make me feel like I never left. Some of them, I wasn't even aware that there was baby number two or three. "It just wouldn't be the same if you didn't take care of all three of our boys." 

 The constant "Welcome backs" make me feel even more at home than I already do. 

I feel so freaking thankful life brought us back to this point. 

Cheers!

Stay At Home Girlfriend

 

“There’s a trick to the ‘graceful exit.’ It begins with the vision to recognize when a job, a life stage, or a relationship is over — and let it go. It means leaving what’s over without denying its validity or its past importance to our lives. It was important. It involves a sense of future, a belief that every exit line is an entry, that we are moving up, rather than out.” 

| Ellen Goodman 

 

 This quote could not be more perfect for my life right now. 

My last day at Goddard was originally scheduled for May 29th, two days before we planned to move. I moved the date up to the 22nd, realizing that I would be a giant stress ball if I didn't take some time off to successfully pack up our place, organize and get rid of things, something I love to do.  The feeling of cleaning and throwing things away that I no longer have use for or straight up, don't like anymore, is something I thoroughly enjoy. I ask myself, "If someone were to secretly throw this away, would I notice?" If the answer is no, in the trash it goes, or the Goodwill pile, depending. 

Before I started working in childcare, I had this weird "year curse," I called it. Every job up until the one I had in a center setting, I completely lost interest in around a year, give or take a month or two. I felt a need for change. I didn't feel the need to change professions, but I did need a change inside the company, so my director, at the time, was happy to put me in another classroom, if I needed. Thankfully, this was an option. Well, I had been at Goddard for a little over two years, loved my classroom at one point and the age group, toddlers, but my last few weeks at Goddard were tough. I had this thought in my mind that I was leaving, my kids were challenging, I just didn't have the patience or want to grow that connection and relationship with the newer kids in my class because I didn't feel it worth it. This was a constant mindset of mine, I had a hard time steering clear from it and this was not good for me on a day to day basis. It was time for a change. I needed change.

Long story short, I was done with work a lot sooner than planned, without a graceful exit, not going to lie. After leaving work so frustrated, I had a hard time holding back tears on each drive home, I decided it wasn't worth it. Financially, it would be tough, having a couple weeks off in between my end date at Goddard and my start date at KinderCare, but this was less important to me than my happiness. I would rather be even more of  a broke joke for a couple weeks, than have upset, frustrated thoughts towards such an amazing company, one that I had been happy with for the last couple years of my life. I wanted to remember Goddard as the place that came as close as possible to the first center that I worked at, the one that set the bar extremely high. I was so happy there. I wanted to keep those grateful thoughts I had towards that place and the management, instead of spending my last few weeks in Colorado, upset and frustrated at the end of every work day. 

So, this week and next, I'm a stay at home girlfriend. 

With the help of our road trip at the beginning of this month, I can now stay awake later than 8PM. I no longer wake up at 6AM and have 2 breakfasts before 10. I actually went back to sleep yesterday and woke up at 11AM and felt extremely disgusted with myself. So, I made myself work out. I decided that I'm going to make amazing use of my time this week and next. 

 This morning, I went and observed another toddler classroom at a high quality center in Boulder. See? Keeping myself busy. I have always been curious about other classrooms, only ever having been in the ones in centers I've worked for. It was an eye opener for me. Seeing the teacher's interactions and love towards the kiddos just made me realize even more that I wasn't in a good place my last couple weeks at Goddard. I was so frustrated that I wasn't taking the time to be the teacher that I can be, and know to be, to better the children and all of our happiness day to day. I also learned, that I need to let go a bit and let toddlers be toddlers. The teachers in the classroom weren't constantly, or at all, worried about things being neat or picked up. How do I even have this mindset with children? Let them be messy! Let them have the option of a bunch of different toys and activities, because they learn when they are having fun and when they want to. Not on my time. I'm taking this realization back to my classroom in Wisconsin, whatever classroom that may be.

In the last week, Joel has been taking apart our yard, replanting things in different planters, rearranging what we're leaving here and getting everything ready to go back to Wisconsin with us. We'll have a yard to call our own to invest time and money into, hooray! Yesterday, he took out each fishie, crab, eel and snail, put them into separate bags, drained the water in our salt water fish tank, took it apart and loaded it into his truck to drive it home to Wisconsin. This motivated me to start some packing myself. I started to take down pictures, pack candles, home decor and put them into boxes. "This is so insane," I kept telling Joel. Packing up our life here seems so surreal, it came so fast. When Joel was finally ready to take off, I kissed him goodbye, told him to be safe and turned the outside light on, a habit, when he leaves and I don't expect his return until late at night. I turned the light off and reminded myself that he wouldn't be home tonight. He would be back in Wisconsin. And then I felt extremely home sick. I thought to myself, how in the world could I feel so homesick? Or was it another feeling? I need to be here. I only have ten more days here. Ten more days in this amazing state that we've called 'home' for the last two and a half years. Oh, Colorado, you deserve a blog post all to yourself. 

In ten days, we close our Colorado chapter and move our life back to the Midwest. It's going to be so weird, great, but so weird to be back there and not just being there to visit. It will be our home. Colorado will now be the place that we visit, not somewhere we come home to. I'll have to remind myself when we get back to the land of cheese that I won't be on vacation but staycation. That's what we said when we moved our lives to Colorado, a little more fitting for this state than Wisconsin.

I'll let you know how my staycation is this coming winter back in the Midwest.

Yikes.

 

Tattoo O'Clock

I got on here intending to blog about our super amazing road trip we did at the beginning of this month but I started to look through my trillion pictures, decide which ones I wanted to post and then my brain started to hurt so I stopped. We'll see if I ever develop ambition for that post of way too many pictures.

I will on the other hand, share some pictures from this past week. 

Last Tuesday we saw Lana Del Rey at Red Rocks, which made my day take a complete 180. I was a little bummed that the weather wasn't as nice as I had wanted it to be and the crop top and high waisted shorts were a 'no-go' but a little chilliness didn't stop me from crying tears of complete and utter contentment. She looked amazing, sounded amazing and I swear, her and I had a moment during "Blue Jeans." Joel and I were both shocked at how young the crowd was. We joked with the couple next to us, who were our age, about the fact that most of the people there probably had no idea who Courtney Love is. Yes, that's right, Courtney Love opened up for Lana Del Rey and it was fantastic. I especially loved her entry into her set, "I'm going to take it back to the 80's, long before you little f***ers were born." She clearly noticed the crowd too. 

My music tastes have calmed, extremely, since we've lived in Colorado, like I've said before. I'm not constantly fist pumping to EDM anymore. Don't get me wrong, I love a good dance party but I spend a lot of time listening to Ben Howard and Lana Del Rey. I'm so happy we were able to see both of them during our Colorado chapter. 

After months of counting down, even via Snapchat (see below) I was reunited in Colorado one last time with one of my best friends. 

This best friend and I date back to Sunday School in our Elementary years. We started out going to church together and bible camp and our friendship has come a long way since. We are similar in ways but also very different and I love her just the same. It was time for her to get one more visit in before we move back to the Midwest. IN 12 DAYS. This is an insane realization, by the way.

Punch Bowl Social Club.

After a little run in with urgent care, too much money put towards medications, an inhaler, rest and some movies, all on her first day here, she was a bit more in "vacation mode." We headed down to Denver for Joel's show and my life was seriously made, sitting next to her and having one of the little boys in my previous class and his parents be there as well. 

Sunday we hiked Greyrock in Fort Collins. I read about it forever ago and needed to do it at least once before we moved. We got on the trail at 11:50AM and got off shortly after 6PM. We literally spent the day hiking. 

Not going to lie, it looks tiny in this picture. But, we were at the top. 

This explains my bad knees. pc: Joel Kachel

Heart rocks, everywhere.

Greyrock is on the right. After getting to the top, we wound around down and through the meadows loop next.

We found perfect walking sticks during our hike and decided to leave them for the next person or group. A little more than six hours later, we finished and felt accomplished, both having trouble blocking out our sore knees. Bad knees at twenty seven, I've accepted it. 

And then yesterday, we got tattoos. 

I have been contemplating getting another tattoo for awhile now and I think the only reason that was, was because I had forgotten what it felt like to get one. I didn't remember it hurting, but being terribly annoying, aggravating. Han went first, first timer, and then it was my turn. I sat down and straight up told the guy not to listen to me if I told him to stop. 

Inked, finally.

pc: Hanna Schulberg

I remember now why I walked out of the tattoo shop the first time and told myself I would never get another one. Who knows, maybe seven years down the road, I'll change my mind again and go get another.

My shoulder now says, "Property of JK Music." 

Just kidding. 

Mother Nature is my Main B

It's actually thundering and lightening outside right now, you guys. I heard one, little, sorry boom of thunder at work a week or two ago, and saw lightening once through the blinds during nap time but this is my first full on storm of the year. This is so exciting. Cleanse my mind, body and soul, Mother Nature, cleanse me. Gosh, it feels good. Just to look out my living room window and see pouring rain. What makes it better is the fact that it's still light out, a nice glow, if you ask me. Let's be real, the sun is shining! As summer is right around the corner, the days are getting longer and it's light until after 8PM. This is the best, the realization that our days are getting longer, warmer. There is nothing like light, and sunshine and a good downpour all at once. This is something I will miss dearly when we move back to the Midwest, the sunshowers. The weathermen actually talk about them. They exist. You got it, it's when the sun is shining bright but it's raining. It's the absolute best. 

It makes me think of a time I had a terrible day at work and then drove home and on my way, was blessed with the most amazing sunshower and then the clouds parted and the rain went away and the sun fully came out just in time to go down. It was beautiful. 

Of course, I Instagramed, think  I didn't? 

The caption was, "Proof that there are greater things than today's frustration." 

Oh man, does Mother Nature feel me. She knows my moods. She knows that this evening's rainfall is all too appropriate after the day I had, the week I had, I should say. The weather is my emotion's, twin, I'm telling you. Between my challenging class of one and a half year olds and my last couple weeks spent at Goddard, my eyes have been leaking lately, lets just say. I've felt frustration and a sense of happy and both are making me more emotional than a pregnant woman. I'm the biggest baby you'll ever meet, I swear to you.

 

What I need is a good downpour to cleanse my mind. And a vacation. I can cross one off the list tonight and the other come, early Sunday morning. Conveniently, today was my last day of work for 9 days and Joel and I are anxiously awaiting a road trip. We dreamed up this plan a couple months ago. Dreamed up, is that right? How do you say that? It's like hanged. Anyways, we developed this master plan and I am so excited we are following through. We are heading towards Utah and doing some camping in Moab. We knew we would never make this trip, after we move back to Wisconsin. Being six hours from Moab is far more manageable than like what, 18 hours? I've always wanted to visit those beautiful arches, stand underneath them. You can bet there will be some pictures taken. After Moab, it's back into Colorado to Telluride, down to Mesa Verde, the Four Corners, back up into Durango and Salida to visit one of my Mom's best friends from high school. We had an amazing last camping trip during the Fall last year, not too far from where we live and thinking about it makes me even more excited to do this road trip. We will be seeing a handful of great places we have not yet seen since we've lived in Colorado. What a wonderful way to start our last month in this beautiful state.

I suppose I can share a couple pictures from my Birthday weekend, last weekend. One of my best friends was in town. She had never been to Colorado, was truly running out of time, us being so close to our move and what better weekend than the one in between our Birthdays. There was nothing like having her here, basking in the sunshine in my backyard and drinking my morning coffee with her. Sharing some drinks, Birthday cards and gifts, laughs, cake, and just being in her presence, gosh, it was lovely.

 

Bridesmaid Material | pc: Joel Kachel

She bought me Drew Barrymore's book for my Birthday. I love cute and/or hilarious coffee table books like it. It's a book of pictures she's taken over the years, hearts in random objects, places. Hearts. Perfect. We all know how much I love love. 

Always wearing those leggings. 

And then look at what I found on my beer glass later that night. 

That's not just my very talented boyfriend playing music in the background, it's a heart puddle of beer placed so perfectly on my glass. Is this real life? 

 

When deciding what I wanted written on our Birthday cake, I took all three of us into account. With Tier having just turned twenty six, me twenty seven, and Joel twenty eight, we needed something fitting for all of us. This is what I went with: 

 

Sparkler candles that didn't really sparkler at all, but we didn't fret. 

 

We visited a couple friends in Denver that had just taken in five foster kittens. Five kittens. At once. Have you ever played with five kittens at the same time? It's happiness, at least, in my world.

 

 

I got no group pictures because the little buggers were speedy things and I was just thoroughly enjoying the moment. Picture this guy, plus four more. Skipping around. Biting each other's ears, wrestling. Greatness. How our friend will give them up, is beyond me. Good luck, Lia.

 

Joel's Mom was also in town for work and was able to stick around for a Joel Kachel show and our Birthday festivities. 

 

Mother In Law Material

Well, that's just not the best cell phone picture ever taken.

 

It was a short, sweet visit from a couple ladies I adore and I loved every minute of it, even though I wish they could have stuck around longer, have seen more, gone exploring. 

 

It's okay, there will be exploring done this week, lots of it. 

Road trip To-Do list, here I come! 

 

Moab road trip: 2 days 

Lana Del Rey at Red Rocks: 11 days 

(Another) best friend comes to town: 12 days 

Move back to the Midwest: 30 days 

 

 

 

Green & Blue Paint on a Paper Plate; That Was Our Art Project Today

Today, my toddlers did an art project in honor of Earth Day, our Beautiful Mother Earth.

So it's my turn.

 

Here's to you, Mother Nature.

You've graced me with so many wonderful moments to photograph these past couple years in Colorado. This is a true Wayne and Garth, "We're not worthy" moment here. 

Photo Locations (from top to bottom)

 

1 & 2.  Poudre Canyon

 

3. Hanging Lake

 

4 & 5. Trail to Deep Lake Campground

 

6 & 7. Poudre Canyon 

 

8. Highway 287

 

9. Trail to Deep Lake Campground

 

 

Friday For The Win

Whoever invented the "delay brew" button on coffee makers is a genius. 

There is just something amazing about waking up to the smell of fresh coffee. 

Also, look how great I'm doing, keeping up with my blog, you guys. I don't know what it is, I blog and then don't for months on end and here I am now, blogging a couple days in a row. Funny, this is one thing that my Taurus, routine stricken self cannot hold on to. Well, this and working out. I'm reminding myself that it's all in my control and I'm rootin for you, Parr! 

Yesterday, was absolutely a win, in my book. I woke up at 6:10AM slept in and drank my coffee, poured my thoughts out into the blog world and felt total, and complete ease. It felt like a Saturday. I find it hilarious how just having one more day during your weekend, can make you so freaking happy. 

I went for a hike. By myself. Have you ever done this? Can I compare it to eating in a restaurant by yourself? I still haven't done that one. Well, sit down. I ate by myself at the Subway in a food court when I worked part time at Rosedale Mall in high school. That doesn't count. There was just something amazing about blaring my music, turning it off occasionally and being alone with my thoughts. Joel and I had spontaneously started the hike once on a whim, and didn't go the entire way. I needed to finish it. You know, the Taurus in me was eaten up by the fact of starting it and not finishing it.

I was almost to the top, power walking, like I do normally, when I almost stepped on a rattlesnake. He was half way on the trail, blended in completely by the rock and sand around him. You can imagine how high I jumped. Picture a cat, with a banana peal. He slithered away and gave me quite the aggressive rattle. Nothing more surprising and shocking than snakes in nature. I can hold and be in the company of Joel's snakes at his parent's house back home in Minnesota, but snakes in the wild? No thanks.

Yesterday, I also did a little shopping. I'm rationalizing my few purchases by reminding myself that I haven't shopped since before the first of the year (can you believe it?) and it's my Birthday month. I usually make a way bigger deal about my Birthday month than I'm doing this year. I honestly don't know why because I love Birthdays and I love growing up. I live for it. Literally. I haven't shopped since the first of the year because, well, I'm trying hard to limit myself, as well as save money for our move back to the Midwest in a couple months. My parents aren't paying for the moving truck this time around and I don't blame them. They have helped us out tremendously in the past and continue to. It's time to be adults and buy the moving truck on our own. We can do it!

I babysat for one of the boys in my class last night, him and his Brother, who is four. Kids are hilarious and I find so much joy in spending a Friday or Saturday here and there for a few hours, flying airplanes around the house, reading too many books and having silly conversations about fire truck beds. Especially, with kids that are too smart for their own good. Kids that use words like, "Similar" and say, "Well" instead of good. Early childhood centers, you make children so smart. You are a great thing.

You bet your bottom he put all those books away.

 As for today, I'll be cleaning the house in preparation for Joel's return home tomorrow morning, listening to Vance Joy on repeat. I'll be having a serious movie date with myself, because Divergent came in the mail yesterday. I'll probably spend some time outside, starring at the recently bloomed tulips. Odds of a solo dance party to Kiesza's "Hideaway" are good because I seriously cannot stop watching that video and wishing I were in it. A solo dance party, that's self-love, isn't it?  I'm going to dream about kissing my boyfriend and then tomorrow, I get to do so, for the first time in a little over a week. Yay!

Guys, this weekend is way cooler than the other side of the pillow.