I literally Googled "How to get yourself out of a funk" last night. 

I sat on my couch, Joel in the other room, giving me my space like the smart man he is, and I read to myself, taking mental notes and then found laughter in what I was doing. We all have days or weeks that you're feeling funky, you're in a funk, things that don't usually annoy you, make you want to cry or just drive and not stop for anything but maybe a salted caramel mocha. Well, I am in funky town, people. And I'm not talking about the place that Lipps Inc. sung about in 1980.

I don't know what it is, but it has taken me over. I have always had a hard time with this. I am an emotional person, but can usually put bad moods into perspective. Right now, negativity is on me like white on rice. And I don't have the answers to why. But chocolate does sound amazing so perhaps I need to look at my planner. Ladies, who's with me? While reading up on how to kick this bs in the tush, I realized that I should probably blog. This was one of the things in the article to destroy a funky mindset. It's been a bit since I've blogged last. The classic phrase of, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" really does ring true. Usually, if there's a lull or a nice, long break in posts, this is probably the conversation I'm having with myself. Do I blog about my thoughts and feelings, with a chance of making people in my life uncomfortable or possibly a little hurt; Make them wonder if it's them that motivated a blog post of mine? Or do I just not write down my thoughts at all? There's your answer. 

The other weekend, I had someone in my life, bring up a time I had hurt them. In middle school. In middle school. I can't stand those years and have a hard time being sensitive to such undeveloped, terribly immature brains, even though I know I was there. I was an awful 14 year old. I felt bad, I apologized but that wasn't enough. I didn't even remember the situation that was brought to my attention, but it obviously hurt her enough to mention it to me in our twenties. I was disgusted at the fact that I hurt this person so much that, as a grown woman, an adult, she felt the need to belittle me, to say something hurtful, to 'get back at' me for something that was said during our middle school days. After my apology for how immature I once was, I quickly realized that the conversation was going nowhere and that a good click of the 'defriend' button, was the best choice. Although, I felt bad for the past, the fact that she came off as immature and hurtful as she did, as an adult, well, I by no means have room for someone like that in my life, even if they are just an acquaintance on Facebook. I like to think that I've done a lot of growing and maturing since middle school and I am nowhere near who I was then. Joel and I have talked various times about how we think we will parent our children some day. I know I will be the more disciplinary one and one hundred percent, he will be the more sensitive one, the more understanding one, mainly during those lovely teenage years. We would hate to hear that our child was bullying or disrespecting others, or not being accepting of people's differences. Mine and Joel's conversation came a day before this woman had mentioned how I had hurt her. I felt so bad about hurting someone's feelings to the point where she was thinking about it 12 years later and if I could go back and change things, I would. But that's just not how life works, is it? 

It reminded me that all I can do, is live from this point on, the best that I can. I can try my best to accept that people are different and at times, people can change and do, for the better. I've also realized in my life lately, that some people aren't understanding of people's differences. There are adults in this world and in my life that still judge and still talk down about how people live their lives differently. I, for one, feel confident about who I am and how I live my life. I blog about things in my life that I find funny, interesting, beautiful, things that make me feel good. Blogging, in itself, makes me feel good. I do it for me. And as adults, aren't we supposed to lift each other up and encourage each other to continue to do things that make us happy? We aren't supposed to discourage each other because we live our lives differently. 

At the grocery store this morning, I had a number of strangers smile at me, I had various workers ask me if I was finding things alright, I even had a man at the check out, who let me go ahead of him, when he had about half the amount of groceries that I had. I left, still in my funk, but feeling better. I came home to someone who kisses me and loves me, even when I'm a giant brat and now you're listening to my thoughts. Strangers, friends, you're listening. You're listening to me slowly put myself in a better mood. If you are, by chance in a funky mood yourself, go to the grocery store smile at a stranger, give someone a compliment, listen to "Funky Town" by Lipps Inc. and then get out of that place. 

Listen to me, because I started this post in a worse mood than I'm in right now.

Happy First of November, friends!